Yesterday we started a mini project (it's due tomorrow) where each person was randomly given a new identity and has to create a healthy, balanced diet for their needs. I'm now a 13-year-old, very athletic male. Landon's an 82 year old who just had triple bi-pass surgery or something awful like that, and Zeb has irritable bowel syndrome. They're in a family together, paired with an obese person and someone who needs to gain weight. Good luck to them. They bought a vending machine, the Snack Master 500 to be precise, but went $3800 over their budget. Nate sold his 168 cats to help pay for it, but I guess life doesn't work like that.
Cats = Vending Machine
(Fail)
Landon's such a great person. He's absolutely hilarious to boot. I love my advisory. This morning we talked about poop.
Christine: Did you know that if your poop sinks you're not getting enough fiber?
Me: ...Really?
Zeb: Well I always knew sinking was a good thing.
Christine: Uhh, that's a bad thing.
Zeb: Wh-what?
Christine: If it's not floating you're not getting enough fiber.
Zeb: Oh...I need some more fiber.
It was probably the best way the day could have started. Today was an all-around good experience, our assignment was actually fun.
What? Schoolwork being fun? Wth?
My family's Cody, Joey and myself (I needed an adult since I'm only 13). We decided to kick Connor out, since he wasn't here today and isn't going to be here tomorrow. Cody's a 17 year old lacto-ovo vegetarian and Joey's a 33-year-old who's totally preggerz. Our budget was so low that we were literally living off of a dollar a day, but it turned out to be a typo. We got a generous donation from our "cousins", so we ditched the whole pricing thing. We'll see how that works out tomorrow.
When we were working in the computer lab Gordy called up a grocery store because he needed to know how much lobster cost. His character is an elder with diabetes, so he took on this old smoker's voice and started ranting about killing Nazis in the war (while he was sitting next to the German girl haha). When he finally got through he said "HELLO I have diabeterz and I'm a diabetic, I need some lobster."
Girl: I can connect you to our seafood department!
Gordy: Why THANK YOU.
Guy: Hello?
Gordy: HELLO how much does your lobster cost? ... Do I get a discount if I use my Hannaford card?... Alright, I'll be in soon. I'll be the old guy with liver spots.
We "worked" straight through lunch, and after that we took a break to eat and didn't do anything the rest of the day. Rhiannon found Joey's iphone and was looking through the apps and happened upon one called "ibrate". That was beginning the of a long string of sexual innuendos. They got so bad that Nate had to leave the room. When Will asked why, Nate told him about the phone, and now the whole school knows about Joey's special vibrating phone. We taped it under her chair when she was out of the room. The look on her face when she sat down was priceless, she was so embarrassed. (When she said she needed to go to the bathroom we of course asked if she needed her phone haha)
Joey also has an app on her phone that eerily resembles the magic eight ball; you ask it a question and it gives you a yes or no answer. We asked questions about Gordy such as (but certainly not limited to):
Will he have sex with a she-male? -Yes
Will he have an orgy with only she-males? -Yes
Will he ever have sex with a respectable woman? -No
Is all this crap happening to him just because he's Black? -Yes
Which brings up another topic. School started almost two weeks ago, and I've only seen George once. (I was reminded because he's Black, and they're pretty rare around these parts). I don't think he even counts as a student at this point.
Classes start on Monday. I'm pumped, even if French probably won't happen because I'm the only student signed up. Singing most likely won't be until session 2 as well, so I'm guessing that's a sign that I didn't do a good job picking my schedule.
Today was our first business meeting, and I seem to be one of the few who likes them. I'm sure after the honeymoon's over I'll evolve into a real senior and detest the meetings, but for now I like them. I think it's because I want to show my appreciation for the freedom that we're handed on a silver platter, or rather one of the dishes Cody used for his "clean these or I'll hide them" discussion. I like being involved and making decisions on what had previously been a mystery to me, like what the adults had always handled.
During the meeting Nick slipped away and found his ipod. I've decided that he's like Kramer from Seinfeld, and that's why I adore being around him. You just can't find someone like Nick, I can't even describe him. I'm sorry I'm at a loss, he's just so interesting. Cody's kinda like Jerry, now that I think about it. Mom told me the other night that I'm like Elaine during an episode where she wouldn't stop complaining about being hungry. :/ Whining is generally something I try to limit, because I feel it's purely negative and doesn't particularly help anyone, but I guess I don't do a good job. I'll just have to try harder!
I really need to finish my part of the project. Good night all, and just because Lady Gaga's amazing:
No comments:
Post a Comment